Irish Traveller Weddings - From Being a Princess To Being a Maid.

When  studying the topic about immigration in Ireland, I came across the “Irish Travellers”, a minority group in Ireland. It reminded me of a documentation I saw some months ago about Traveller girls and their weddings. For a Traveller girl her own wedding day is the most important day of her life, as it is the only occasion she can make the decisions (the Traveller society is a rather male-dominated society – women are just expected to keep the house and to take care of the children). Most girls marry at a young age, at about 16 or even earlier. Although still most marriages are arranged by the parents, the couple may have a say in finalizing the match. They often marry a second cousin or at least another member of the group in order to avoid the “mixing” with other groups.

The real Traveller wedding costs a fortune – every family wants to impress others with a white horse-drawn carriage, ten-tier wedding cakes, stunning flower arrangements  and, of course, a breath-taking bridal gown. There are specialised tailors in Ireland that only sew bridal gowns for Traveller weddings. Also the other female wedding guests dress very extravagant. They often try to exceed the other girls with their dresses, which are usually very short.

At such Traveller weddings lots of alcohol is being consumed and later that night the young and unmarried boys start “stealing” the girl they fancy (there is a special name for this rite, but unfortunatelly I’ve forgotten it… :/). At some point of the party they  simply take another unmarried girl with them and vanish with her into the dark. There, they have the chance to get to know each other better or to exchange kisses while the wedding party is still going on. This can be a good occasion to spend time with one’s crush but it also happens quite often that the girl doesn’t want to be alone with the boy at all. Also violence towards girl and women is no rarity among Travellers. Funnily enough, the rite of stealing girls is accepted among the Traveller society, although it is forbidden to have sex before marriage.

  But back to the wedding:  After the marriage, the young couple usually moves into a small caravan. The young brides normally don’t work – they stay at home all day long, clean, cook and wait for their husband to come home. I’m sure these women feel very disappointed as their new life as a wife started phenomenally with a fairytale wedding – but ended in being locked in a small caravan.

 

Why It Is Important to Ask Twice - A True Story

When I was 14 I took part in an exchange program. Most of the students in my class had an exchange partner from our partner school in Slough (about one hour from London). We were writing emails and letters and in May 2004 the English students visited us for ten days in Austria. Me and my exchange partner Emerald got along very well. Sure, at the beginning it was a bit awkward to have someone you had never met before staying at your house, but after some days we got used to it and we both enjoyed visiting the typical Austrian sites. The only thing was that I always had the feeling that she wasn't really keen on eating Austrian food like Schnitzl, Schweinsbraten or Kaiserschmarren. She tasted everything, but she just ate a little bit and then claimed to be full - just to eat a whole package of crisps as a dessert.

So, one day my mother thought it would be good to have something "international" for dinner. We decided to order some pizzas from a local pizzeria. I asked Emerald which kind of pizza she wanted to have and she answered that she just liked "the normal one with pepperoni". I felt quite disgusted by the thought of eating a pizza just with (what I thought) "Pfefferoni" on it, but I didn't bother asking twice and ordered a pizza with jalapeño peppers for her.

You can't imagine the look on her face when the pizza was being delivered and Emerald opened the pizza box! She didn't want to be impolite and point out that I'd misunderstood her, so she tried to eat the pizza including the spicy jalapeños. But after some pieces of pizza she started putting away the jalapenos. When I asked if everything was alright, she admitted that "pepperoni" in English actually means "Salami" and that she had just wanted a normal "Salami-Pizza"!

Sure, at first I felt embarrassed about this stupid mistake but when Emerald started laughing, I simply had to join in. Today, after more than four years, she sometimes still makes fun of me because of our "pepperoni-debacle"...